Influencing others isn't just about presenting a strong argument. It’s more about understanding, listening, and adapting. Whether you're leading a team, negotiating with stakeholders, or giving feedback, these influencing principles can make or break the outcome. These strategies are also applied across our communication and leadership workshops for practical impact.

✅ Influencing Do’s

• Understand before being understood: Focus on what matters to the other person. Don’t just push your own views. For example, in a recent training, a team leader realized a tough conversation went better once she asked her team member’s opinion first.
• Show you're listening: Use clarifying questions and summaries to prove you’re tuned in.
• Know your triggers: Stay self-aware and watch out for your own defensiveness or assumptions.
• Ask open-ended questions: Encourage dialogue, not debate.
• Use body language that matches your words: Posture, tone, and eye contact matter more than you think.
• Let others solve their own problems: Facilitate thinking instead of offering ready-made advice.
• Match your style to the situation: Don’t rely on the same tone or tactic every time.
• Be open to change: Influencing is a two-way street—invite feedback and accept it.
• Own your message: Speak up with clarity and confidence, but not arrogance.
• Find common ground: Share enthusiasm and highlight shared interests.

🚫 Influencing Don’ts

• Don’t lock into one position: Flexibility earns trust; rigidity triggers resistance.
• Don’t get emotional: Yelling or dominating behavior quickly kills credibility.
• Don’t interrupt: Let others speak fully before responding.
• Don’t hog the airtime: Talking more doesn’t equal influencing more.
• Don’t over-rely on logic: Facts matter, but they’re not enough. Emotions, values, and context count too.
• Don’t resist being influenced: Real influence goes both ways.
• Don’t assume intent: Ask, don’t guess, what’s driving the other person.
• Don’t ignore feedback: If you ask for it, act on it.
• Don’t jump into advice mode: Ask questions instead of prescribing solutions.
• Don’t leave people guessing: Be clear about what you want and why.